非常感谢lz分享，写的还是很有道理的。改变自己成为更好的人，活在当下，总是没错的。

其它可能对已经结婚的有很好感情基础的人适用。对正在dating接触的人，并不是绝对适用。

嗯，自己的情况是恋爱五年都挺好的，结婚有孩子后开始进入俗套的鸡毛蒜皮里，消磨了情感。如果恋爱时就痛苦了，那分了是止痛的最好办法。

我觉得 marriage is hard，50% marriage end at separate。

养娃 is even harder。:-,P

但就我自己而言，没有追求过家庭和养娃的人生是不完整的。

但另一方面，追求不等于成功。It is not about 成功，it is about meaning of the life.

Regrets, I’ve had a few

But then again, too few to mention

I did what I had to do

And saw it through without exemption

I planned each charted course

Each careful step along the byway

And more, much more than this, I did it my way

Yes, there were times, I’m sure you knew

When I bit off more than I could chew

But through it all, when there was doubt

I ate it up and spit it out

I faced it all and I stood tall and did it my way

I’ve loved, I’ve laughed and cried

I’ve had my fill, my share of losing

And now, as tears subside

I find it all so amusing

To think I did all that

And may I say, not in a shy way

https://app.box.com/s/qy1m1fdm87d0lay86iohdqq6s04az6ns

And now, the end is near

And so I face the final curtain

My friend, I’ll say it clear

I’ll state my case, of which I’m certain

I’ve lived a life that’s full

I traveled each and every highway

And more, much more than this, I did it my way

Regrets, I’ve had a few

But then again, too few to mention

I did what I had to do

And saw it through without exemption

I planned each charted course

Each careful step along the byway

And more, much more than this, I did it my way

Yes, there were times, I’m sure you knew

When I bit off more than I could chew

But through it all, when there was doubt

I ate it up and spit it out

I faced it all and I stood tall and did it my way

I’ve loved, I’ve laughed and cried

I’ve had my fill, my share of losing

And now, as tears subside

I find it all so amusing

To think I did all that

And may I say, not in a shy way

Oh, no, oh, no, not me, I did it my way

For what is a man, what has he got?

If not himself, then he has not

To say the things he truly feels

And not the words of one who kneels

The record shows

I took the blows

And did it my way

Yes, it was my way

这就是我说的意思，阴道高潮不重要，the sense of purpose, the meaning of life 才重要。

当然我们大家可以继续版面上互殴阴道高潮是不是重要哈哈哈

这是我早期写的一个帖子，里面提到了关于示弱的这个关键词，顶一下让大家可以交流这个话题。

这位版主，我很喜欢看你的帖子，分享的一些东西很好，谢谢你。

我也经历过2年 异地

一年只见2次，一次一周

那时我家老二还不到3岁

我好像习惯了 什么都自己找解决办法，也没觉得怎么样

倒是很期待每次见面那一周

傻乎乎还觉得很性福。

去他那里 都是住hotel，一家4口

大娃大了，不方便

我俩躲洗手间 速战速决

当时觉得很开心

你首页提的问题，我也想过，也经历过想要离婚的阶段

不过我喜欢把问题往自己身上揽

他的变化，肯定有我的原因，

然后无解 就大事化小了

謝分享 经营亲密关系个人data point实践心得

我讚！====》

「不过我喜欢把问题往自己身上揽

他的变化，肯定有我的原因，

然后无解 就大事化小了」

與第一任丈夫幾十年來的磨練

我也是如此策略

1. 問題出現 是我認為的問題，別人不一定要認同 是問題
2. 要花資源 心思如何 掌握好 一個平心靜氣 理性溝通 來找共識 這個技術 我的長進十分慢 而且 事倍功半 徒勞許多資源 而回饋低 。皆因資源一開始就不足，每天雞毛蒜皮的事已堆積如山
3. 最有效的治本策略是 在自己這方面做 retrospective： Moving forward what I can do better
4. 請第一任丈夫 做 retrospective，他的分析總結 總是：「I don't know what I could do better」我無語