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Huaren
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威望22
贴子17028
魅力17450
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两年制男子必读课程(转载)

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2005-04-06 19:14:00

那个女子版的那??

Huaren
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威望22
贴子17028
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2005-04-06 19:28:00

发信人: stautshi (无敌牛虱), 信区: Oversea
标 题: Stautshi原创--两年制女子必读课程
发信站: BBS 大话西游站 (Wed Apr 6 12:38:33 2005), 转信

写个女子教程,这年头女的够优待了,哼唧


: 秋季课程
: MEN101 - 战胜愚蠢 (Combating Stupidity)
你确实胖了(you are fat,stop asking me)
: MEN102 - 你!也可以学会做家务 (You, Too, Can Do Housework)
你也能换电灯泡(changing bulb is not suicide)
: MEN103 - 学会闭嘴!(Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut)
闭嘴(shut up!always shut up!)
: MEN104 - 别买色情内衣作为圣诞礼物 (We Do Not Want Sleazy Under Things for : Christmas)
别买剃须刀,我自己知道需要什么(stop buying shaver,we know how long our beard should be)
: 冬季课程
: MEN110 - 有趣的洗衣技术 (Wonderful Laundry Techniques)
简单电器修理(A hit can do 90% of the job,don't bother me)
: MEN111 - 半夜回家须知 (Understanding the Female Response to Getting in at 4AM)
应酬体验(believe me, it is not fun to stay in pub after midnight)
: MEN112 - 如何做父亲:怀孕才是开头 (Parenting: It Doesn't End with Conception)
如何做母亲:疼是肯定的(parenting:it is always painful)
: EAT100 - 学着点,初级烹饪技术 (Get A Life, Learn to Cook I)
快点,初级购物指南(every store has very simple and helpful maps!)
: EAT101 - 学着点,中级烹饪技术 (Get A Life, Learn to Cook II)
快点,中级购物指南(buying something useful 5 years later is stupid)
: ECON001 - 她的就是她的 (What's Hers is Hers)
他的就是他的,如果他愿意给,他会给的(what's his is his)
: : 春季课程
: MEN120 - 如何正确对待你的错误 (How Not to Act Like a Butt Face When You're : Wrong)
如何正确对待你的错误(why crying or showing large boobs do not help)
: MEN121 - 正确理解自己的无能 (Understanding Your Incompetence)
为什么隔壁太太比你好(you are not omnipotence)
: MEN122 - 男性:软弱的性别 (You, The Weaker Sex)
女性,你很强么?(women, why you lost dominance since human history)
: MEN123 - 献花的理由 (Reason to Give Flowers)
如果你要花,你说就是了(if you want flower, say it, don't let me guess)
: ECON002 - 你的也是她的 (Whant was Yours is Hers)
初级婚姻法:财产公证与分割(enjoy everything before divorce)
: : 第二年
: : 秋季课程
: SEX101 - 学会在没有性生活的情况下睡一个好觉 (You CAN Fall Asleep without Sex)
我们只需要10分钟(we need only 10 minutes, less than the time you take care of your ears)
: SEX102 - 如何在性生活之后保持清醒的头脑 (How to Stay Awake After Sex)
男人不是机器(if you want more during sex, ask for less after sex,ok? we are not porn star)
: MEN201 - 如何在解手之后把厕所的座板放下来 (How to Put the Toilet Seat Down)
天生如此(hey! it is not our fault to stand and pee, ask GOD)
: : 冬季课程
: MEN210 - 如何正确适用遥控器:克服你的依赖性 (The Remote Control: Overcoming : Your Dependency)
电器都有使用手册(everything has a manual, you are not blind)
: MEN211 - 如何才能显得比你的孩子老成 (How to Not Act Younger than Your : Children)
你比你女儿老(you are not 18 any more) : MEN212 - 你!也可以做一个可靠的司机 (You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver)
如何驾驶(may I ask where you learn how to drive?)
: MEN213 - 相信我,你没有汤姆。克鲁斯长得帅 (Believe Me, You Don't Look Like : Tom Cruise)
也相信我,你没有李嘉欣漂亮(not every woman prettier than you is a bitch)
: MEN230 - 她的生日和周年纪念日是重要的I (Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are : Important I)
记忆原理(only a very small part controls memory in your brain. Say why you forgot buying the same shoes last year!)
: 春季课程
: MEN230 - 废话少说 (Omitting $#@@ From Your Vocabulary, Pass/Fail Only)
哪件都好(all clothes are ok, yeah, the shoes are fine too)
: MEN231 - 她的生日和周年纪念日是重要的II (Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are : ImportantII)
记忆原理II(remember what we learned last semester?)
: MEN222 - 真正的男子汉敢于向媳妇问路 (Real Man Ask for Directions)
如果不知道路就别烦我(now why you shouldn't stop me last month when I wanted to buy that gps, It is not a toy!)
: MEN223 - 求情30分钟没有什么难为情的 (Thirty Minutes of Begging is not : Considered Weak)
只要你要听我说(It is rude to close the door when someone try to talk to you, especially when someone is your husband)
: : 选修课程
: EAT101 - 豆腐烹饪技术 (Cooking with Tofu)
外面吃挺好(It is just fine to eat somewhere not here)
: EAT102 - 如何正确使用厨房的器物 (Utilization of Eating Utensils)
如何正确使用电脑(computer is not Tv)
: MAN231 - 可爱的岳母 (Mother-in-law)
可爱的婆婆(mother in law)
: MAN232 - 假装倾听 (Appear to Be Listening)
少八卦(stop gossiping)
: MAN233 - 学会说:“好呀,亲爱的” (Just Say "Yes, Dear")
购物指南(we should really talk about your shopping, seriously)


: ECON003 - 离婚费钱 (Cheaper to Keep Her)
不要做泼妇(1000 ways to save your marriage and one way don't)
:


[此贴子已经被作者于2005-4-6 19:29:07编辑过]

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